25/01/26
i'm most surprised about how well i've been doing with tarot. (using what i have and Not Buying). i decided to use two decks per month, which actually meant i had to go into my "to donate" bin to have enough if i didn't want to repeat decks. in the past these types of challenges really didn't work for me, i'd get extremely frustrated at *having to* use specific decks, and not decks that i was in the mood for at any given moment. maybe it's that in the past i'd do this kind of thing in order to force myself to use neglected decks. but they were neglected for a reason, even if it wasn't a clear, apparent one. this time around i'm mostly using decks that i know i already like and use, so it's less of a struggle. only some are "trying to make it work" decks.
mostly that category comprises of my handmade decks - all four are in there. and i tried to mix it up, so that there's always a pip deck and an rws in each month's pair. or if there's a "weird" deck, like the petersen or anything based on the picard system, that they're paired with one of the familiar systems. i tried to pick decks that feel like they match the month, but some months are just "leftover" decks that didn't fit anywhere else. turns out i don't have much that feels like late spring/early summer.
the success might also be attributed to the decks i picked for january? (maybe there will be a month that feels as constrained as the previous challenges). but if that's the case, it really is the biggest surprise. i primarily used the deck i made myself: the "shadowplay" tarot was made as a creative challenge from one issue of the magazine of that same name. i didn't expect it to be a very functional deck, i was just happy that it was possible to cobble a whole deck together from the limited materials. i was satisfied with it but didn't reach for it often. then at one point i decided to add silver elements to it for some visual interest, but immediately regretted it. it seemed the "pure" collage was more impactful, that my scrawly additions ruined the effect. i didn't reach for it almost ever prior to this month.
but somehow it's been the one i exclusively used from the january pair. despite being more of a pip-person in recent years, the tarocchi '23 didn't tempt me at all. i had plans for it but ultimately used it once or twice for a game of solitaire, that's all. so i'm not sure whether i've been reaching for shadowplay because it's Actually Good or because i wanted to avoid the empty, barren feeling of the tarocchi '23? (also a good thing to learn, maybe i'll retire that one into the donate bin at the end).
i've also done well with not checking out new decks in the online stores. i mean... i resisted temptation twice. and then at one point i couldn't curb my curiosity any longer and i did a very quick browse and luckily it was as disappointing as i'd hoped. i do sometimes talk myself into purchases, but it's more and more rare, the bar is getting higher. i know it was a fluke and i can't keep doing it, but ultimately i'm glad i checked - it seems a lot of built up pressure got released. and now i have another instance of the reassuring "i know there's nothing on there" to reach for if curiosity arises again. and with each month i'm getting closer to one of the two Purchases Allowed dates (birthday and christmas).
an idea for this challenge: if in any future month i feel like the decks i'm using are restricting and i hate it and it's frustrating and i want to quit - i can dip into the decks from the previous months - to get even more use and enjoyment out of them. after all that's the point! i don't want to work myself up into a feeling of "i don't have a good deck to use" and "tarot's no fun anymore, it needs rekindling (with a purchase)".